True Family Values introduces the marriage Blessing based upon the principles of Creation and Fall. In 1996, I presented to American clergy a TFV curriculum called “Creating a Faithful Christian Marriage.” In the coming weeks I will present that curriculum updated, in hope that it may be useful for national restoration. Let’s get started.
“Family values are desirable principles or qualities directly connected to the family.
A value is a principle or quality that a person desires. If I desire happiness, then happiness is a value to me. If I desire honesty, beauty, friendship, or profit, then these are my values. Family values, then, means desirable principles or qualities directly connected to the family.
What is a family? I define it as sets of relationships, “realms of heart,” shared among parents and children, husband and wife, and siblings. Family values, then, are the principles or qualities that build and protect these relationships. The obvious family value is love. There are many others, such as care, respect, intimacy, leadership, cooperation, and so forth.
Do family values appear automatically? When we are children, our parents’ love is a given. Having parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles, brothers and sisters seems automatic. But as we grow up, we realize how much effort our parents made to love us, our grandparents made to hold the family together. We realize that marriage and family require us to practice family values.
The fact that family life is in rapid decline indicates that we are not practicing family values. The reason is that we have competing values that break down marriage and family relationships. Call them false family values. For example, lust competes with love, jealousy with trust, resentment with gratitude. Instead of caring, we complain; instead of giving, we take; instead of committing, we set conditions.
“We all know what false values are, but we don’t know how to free ourselves from them.”
We don’t want to admit that we hold these values, but we do readily admit that we are not perfect. “Not perfect” means that inside of us, like an infection, are things not true to us. That are false.
We all know what these false values are, but we don’t know how to free ourselves from them. The purpose of Creating A+ Family is to explore the origin of these false values, and how to remove the infection, restore health, and create a true family.
(NOTE: Both true and false family values are universal, and all religious traditions tell us of them. I am from a Christian background and will draw from the Bible. My colleagues will explore True Family Values based upon their own traditions.)